ever been to a buffet?

first you eat some bacon. then a slice of pepperoni pizza. then you realize there's a whole table of desserts around the corner from the meat carving station.

having money makes the whole world a buffet. whatever you want to consume, you can have in ~unlimited quantities. but it starts small, and is different for everyone based on their tastes. for example, you may buy a new computer on a whim. or go shopping. or buy your friend's movie ticket.

then the "buffet effect" sets in, just like it does at a literal buffet. you start to feel sick for over-indulging. not physically sick, but mentally... confused. should i have upgraded that flight to first class? do friends feel awkward when i pay for them?

another common phenomenon is guilt. the first time i doubled my salary i was on my way to JFK and received an email with the good news. i looked next to me at an airport employee and felt "bad" for them. why was i (probably) making more money, at half their age and less than half their life experiences? it took me awhile to acknowledge this sentiment as an insidious form of virtue signaling (evil) and that we must de-couple our salary from our sense of self worth. we also have to separate -- at least to some degree -- our salary from our perceived intelligence. a lot of dumbasses make a lot of money. a lot of wicked smart people work blue collar jobs.

after pushing through the 2 phases above, people with money often start acting like they don't have money. no flashy shows of status, no first class upgrades (unless they're free / with points), and an almost fascination with wearing out property (cars, computers) until it gives up, vs chasing the newest gadgets.

i know at least 1 "rich" person who still has a cracked iPhone 5 or beater car. i personally still get all my clothes from Target. the person without money thinks this is ludicrous. the person with money, who's already tried the buffet approach, knows it's the only way to stay sane.

at the risk of sounding tacky, yes, it's better to have money than not. but it won't solve all your problems, "just the money problems." and most of us have much deeper issues than money: relationships, health, sense of purpose, and so on.

i was recently asked in a public forum, "what's your why?" my response: i don't know yet.